Friday, August 16, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday": A Little Lazy & Narcissistic? I Have The Dating App For You!

Another SCF is upon us and not a moment too soon! I need a weekend my friends!

But before I shuttle off for cocktails and witty banter with another (hopefully) quality suitor, I wanted to take a minute and let you all know about a fairly new "dating" app called Tinder. Now I use the air quotes around the word dating because really, it's a stretch to call it a dating site.

Allow me to explain. The Tinder app is a lazy person's dream. To create a profile, all you have to do is is put in your Facebook log on, it pulls over your name, age, and up to 5 pictures that you can choose to display on your Tinder profile. Viola'! That's all there is to setting up a profile. You do have the option to add a description or tell potential dates a little about yourself but really, who needs to know anything about someone they might hook up with?

And unlike other pesky dating sites that make you take a personality quiz or checklist a detailed set of criteria that describes who you are looking for, Tinder makes it easy. You choose if you're looking for male or female, set your radius that you want you potential dates to be in proximity to you, and your preferred age range of profiles returned. That's it. No really, that's all the filtering criteria you can select. May the odds be ever in your favor.

Once your profile is set up and your 3 available filtering criteria chosen,  the fun really begins. The hook with Tinder is that you literally face no chance of rejection initially. Profiles appear and as quickly as you can swipe your finger left to reject someone or right to choose them, the next profile pops up for you to swipe to the winner or losers column.

The person doesn't know that you have right swiped them as a potential match until or unless they also right swipe you and then you get a little fanfare that you're a match and are prompted to start a conversation with that person to get the ball rolling. Should your hearts desire not find you to their liking and you get the dreaded left swipe, you are none the wiser leaving your fragile ego intact.

In theory, this sounds like a great idea. However, I know of people who will literally spend hours swiping hotties just to see how many have already selected them. It's validation in the worst way and does little else than inflate the already healthy egos of those that are on Tinder for sport.

It's not a bad way to kill a little time though when you are waiting in the doctor's office, stuck in stand still traffic, or having trouble falling asleep at night though I must admit. The sport aspect of "if I right swipe him, has he already right swiped me?" and the little "Booyaa!" moment of validation when you instantly get the celebratory clinking together of your profile pictures as Tinder announces there is mutual interest is a bit of a pick me up. Who doesn't want to feel wanted once in a while?

I've yet to determine the overall intentions of the majority of current Tinder users but I don't get the feeling that it's quite as skanky as a full on hook up site, nor is it quite as legit as an in-depth dating site either. To it's credit, I have gone out with a guy I "bumped in to" on Tinder and he was a solid guy and the date went well so I can't completely bag on it. But that was one out of 40+ matches in the short time I have been on. Most chat for a while with no real intention of actually meeting up or more times than not, it guys that are in town for a short period of time and are looking to entertain themselves with the local flavor while they are here.

I would venture to say that 90% of my single friends are on Tinder currently, which makes it a little awkward when you keep seeing people you know pop up to be swiped left or right. You don't want to left swipe them to oblivion because you are friends but you don't want to right swipe, find out you matched, and then have that awkward recognition and celebratory profile pic clinking moment either. It's a delicate dance I tell ya!

I approach my time on Tinder like I have my time on all the dating sites I have been on, with a mix of cautious optimism and morbid curiosity. If you're single and looking, give Tinder a try. If you're bored and curious, try it out as well. If you're looking for your soul mate, you may want to look elsewhere.

Monday, August 12, 2013

Pre Season Fun - Football On Your Phone

It's back! Football season! I've been waiting all year for this. Not only does it signal the beginning of my favorite season, but it gives me plenty of weekend entertainment to look forward to for the next 5 months or so.

And what could be better to kick off football season with than a little bit of ridiculousness from the Manning brothers? Now, I'm still a little sad that Peyton broke up with me and moved to Denver but I'm willing to be the bigger person and give him some props for this hilarious video.

Are you ready for some football?!? Apparently you can have football in your pants now. At least that's what the video says.  Well done DirecTV, you get my vote for best commercial.

Friday, August 9, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - A little bit ridiculous, a whole lot of genius

Happy "Soft-Core Friday" kids! It's been a while and I'm tired of talking about break ups, revelations, and my dad's chemo treatments so let's get back to a little bit o' fun shall we?

Ladies, how many times have you been somewhere, like an outdoor concert, camping trip, or just somewhere with way too many women and way too few bathrooms? Well, rest easy because there is a new product that will allow you to handle things like a man and get on with your business: the P EZ.

Yep, that's right. The new portable urinal designed specifically for the girl on the go...pun intended!

These babies are running in high demand, selling out Groupon offers and websites alike. There is seriously a need for this product and women who are sick of losing their awesome pit spot at concerts or having to pull over all the time on a road trip are snatching these things up like hotcakes! No more waiting in line for these girls!

Here's a link to a recent ABC News article about this genius little product. I know what all the girls on my Christmas list are getting this year. I'm sure they'll thank me for that.

And because it's Friday and I'm getting my country on tonight, I'm starting my day on the opposite end of the spectrum and getting some Jay-Z lovin' on. Enjoy Holy Grail by HOVA and JT. Feel free to brush the dirt off your shoulder enthusiastically at your desk. No one will mind.

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Expectations Not Met

How many times have you taken a customer service survey or filled out a product return form and seen the little box begging to be checked: Expectations Not Met

What about in relationships? How many relationships have ended and left you feeling like you need to check the box beside "Expectations Not Met" on the post-relationship survey? I would venture to say it could be applicable to every break up, fizzled out high-potential relationship, and divorce.

Can expectations ever really be met?

I look at my most recent failed relationship and I have to own the fact that a major component of that failure was not him actually lacking anything, it was me having expectations that he couldn't, in all fairness, really meet. Was that me setting him up for failure? Yes, yes it was. Was it me always giving myself an exit to run out of should I decide that it was getting too hard or too serious or requiring too much communication and openness from me? Yep, that too.

This is nothing new for me, for us. This is not the first break up. It's not the first time that I've been disappointed in how something was handled. It's not the first time my expectations haven't been met.

Will I do things differently next time? Probably not.

How do you manage expectation in you relationships? Have you ever broken up with a  perfectly good person because you can't let yourself be content with what's in front of you? Tell me about! 

Friday, July 26, 2013

Things Change

For the last couple years, you have gotten to know me as Random Girl: the good, the bad, and the ugly.  I have shared my shenanigan-filled adventures, bad decisions, struggles as a single and/or coupled girl,  challenges as a mother, and a lot of other stuff that I just thought was funny or weird or something you might relate to.

I have been unfiltered.

I have made decisions that some would find questionable.

I have over-shared in just about every way possible.

I regret nothing.

Everything that I put in words is me. I own it all. It's all real life, unless specifically noted as fiction for a writing challenge or because inspiration gave me a story.

But people change sometimes. And I think that I'm an example of that happening.

Actually, I don't know if it's so much a matter of me changing as it is just a matter of me getting back to my foundation, to what I know to be truth, and really focusing on those things as opposed to just taking whatever comes my way. I think I'm living closer to my truth now than I have in a very long time and it feels darn good.

I don't regret a single thing that I have done because I know that I had to experience each and every one of those things to bring me to the place that I am today.

I made the road very difficult for myself by making bad decisions. I hurt people and I hurt myself by being selfish, stubborn, and giving in to my sinful nature with very little resistance. I ignored the things that I know to be true and be right so I could do the things that I wanted to do when I wanted to do them.

I lived like today was all there was, with no consequence or accountability. I gave no thought to what my true purpose was in this world or what God had created me to be and to accomplish with the time he has given me.

I lost my focus.

I feel like finally it has returned. My thoughts are focused on God and the good things He wants for me. The things He wants me to do for His glory, not for my own.

I am not a newly saved "Jesus freak" who thinks I am above everyone else and nothing I did before was really me. I'm not disowning my failures, forgetting my shortcomings, or denying who I am. I am, however, living in gratitude in the truth that I'm a sinner saved by God's grace and that through Him, all things are possible.

Nothing is held against me. I'm not judged on my deeds. I am completely sufficient even in my brokenness.

I sin daily. I am short tempered, lustful, selfish, and materialistic. I get jealous of what other's have, I don't help those in need as much as I should, and I still get caught up in a thousand other things that distract me from God's truth and my purpose. And I know that even with all of that, I am loved, sought after, and have been given a specific reason for every moment.

Every trial, heartbreak, and tragedy I have been served with has been a unique blessing. Those trials are not over and it's not His intention for our life to be easy or comfortable, but to be purposeful in showing others His love and grace. That's what I'm here for and I am asking God to use me to show others the light and love of His kingdom.

What does this mean for Random Girl?

I considered deleting it all, erasing those words, distancing myself from the things I have engaged in and shared about. But I'm not and I won't. I'm not ashamed of what I have done or where I have been. It's a part of who I am. And I think it serves to bear an even greater witness. Anyone, even someone like me who has a list of shenanigans and sins a mile long, is forgiven and loved.

So I'm letting it remain out there for the world to see. I hope that what is seen going forward is just as well accepted as what I have written and shared in the past and that those that have followed me continue to do so with an open, accepting mind.

I am after all, still Random Girl.

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Roller Coasters & Relationships: More alike than different

I recently got the rare chance to go to an amusement park without the Princess. That meant an entire day of grown up roller coaster fun! Days like that are few and far between. I usually feel too guilty to go have fun without the princess but the stars aligned and she got to have a kid fun weekend with the grandparents while I got to head to Lake Erie for a weekend at Cedar Point. If you haven't been and you love roller coasters, you MUST go. Six flags be damned...Cedar Point is where it's at! Trust me on this.

Now there are more than a handful of great, scary, awesome coasters to be found there. But one of my favorites is Top Thrill Dragster. This ride is crazy looking and even crazier to ride because for all of the hours standing in line, you get 17 seconds of super fast, super high, don't know which was is up or down excitement. I love it!

And really it's no surprise that I love that ride because the comparisons between that and my love life are pretty much right on.

It begins with the hours long line. It winds around the corral, layers deep and filled with people of all sorts. There is no better social experiment that to watch the behavior of and listen to the conversations being had by the people standing in line with you for a roller coaster. It's a scary thing. Much like my dating history, filled with people that you can't believe you are connected to and wondering if you will ever get to the end of the line in one piece and hop on the ride to enjoy the thrill of your life.

By some miracle, you manage to survive the journey to the front of the line and it's almost your turn to get on the ride.  That's where the "I feel like I'm going to throw up/pee my pants" feeling starts to kick in. Even if you been on the ride before, it still hits you as you realize that you are only two riders away from getting on it.

This is where, in the relationship realm, things start to go from casual to the prospect of being in an actual relationship. You are excited about the idea of it, but it kind of makes you want to throw up at the same time.  You're pretty sure if you can just have some courage and stick it out, you'll be so glad you did once your ride is over. You only contemplate ducking under the turnstile once or twice while you are waiting there anxiously for it to be your turn.

You've stuck it out this long, hours into the wait, winding through endless miles of metal corrals, enduring the inane chatter of the freaks in line with you, and now it's your turn to climb onto the ride. You wonder how the single seat belt and measly lap bar could possibly keep you from flying right off the ride and plummeting to your death. This can't be safe! But you talk yourself down, stifle the panic attack, and decide you are going to hang on tight and enjoy the ride.

From a relationship standpoint, this is where you decide to quit worrying about what might happen, what might go wrong, and just make up your mind to enjoy the ups and downs that are about to come your way. You know if you just hang on tight, you will be taken for the ride of your life. You buckle in tight and hope for the best.

Then it's GO time. For this particular ride, you go up to the line like a drag car would, the lights go yellow, yellow, yellow, green and then you launch from 0 to 120mph in less than 4 seconds. That's freaking fast people!!  You don't even have time to scream. Next thing you know, you are are shooting 410 feet straight up to the sky and twisting as you do. You have just a few seconds as the car rounds the top, where you can take in the beautiful view of Lake Erie, before you plummet straight down towards the ground. You level out at the last possible second and find yourself wondering what the heck just happened and how it could be over already.

For relationships, this is the whirlwind part. You shoot off superfast, too fast to even react to things that might be awesome or might be scary. Then you fly straight to the sky, nothing can stop you, it's all just twisting and climbing. You get a moment where you can look around and enjoy the view, take in what has just happened and where the two of you are for that moment in time, and then you are right back into the fast paced descent. For some relationships, this is where you look forward to leveling off into a stable, safe pace. For others, it's the crash at the end of a crazy ride where you really just want it to stop so you can walk, not run, to the nearest exit!

17 seconds. That's how long this ride lasts. That's about as long as some of my relationships have lasted! This time was a little different. I was on the ride with the right guy. We waited together, climb on together, held on together, and enjoyed the up and downs of the crazy ride together. We walked, didn't run, to the nearest exit together. And then we got back in line to do it all again together.

Maybe that's the secret. You can make it through the ups and downs of roller coaster and relationships and actually enjoy the entire ride if you have the right person screaming along with you.

Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Vodka and Summer Lovin'

I know, I've been away for how long and that's what I come back with? Yep. Pretty much.

My summer has thus far consisted of copious amounts of vodka, live music, and summer lovin'. I'm not complaining one bit. Don't get me wrong, my normal work/gym/princess routine is still very much prevalent but as far as being super ambitious for the rest of my summer? It's just not going to happen.

This week I take the princess to see Justin Bieber. We will both be coming home deaf from screaming girls and wearing Bieber T-shirts, you can count on it.

I've enjoyed catching up with some of my fave blogs and will continue to work my way through the back log. Sounds like there is a lot going on with all of you.

What's been your favorite part of summer so far? Any place I MUST visit? Let me know!

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Random Girl at The Indie Chicks - Random Girl Gets Boobs (Part 1)

Hey all! I have been a total slacker on the blog front as of late, both posting and reading, so I apologize for not pimping my good friends at The Indie Chicks sooner!

Those awesome ladies are letting me share my story about my boob adventure with their beautiful, kick ass readers. Go check it out!

Friday, May 17, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - Want to Snuggle? It's Gonna Cost You!

Happy "Soft-Core Friday" all! Hope you have been enjoying this upswing in temps and the hope that summer is coming fast.

I ran across this article and it really just couldn't be left alone in my opinion. A woman has decided to make herself available to fulfill people's longing for human touch, and make a buck in the process. She has dubbed herself as a "professional snuggler" and I'm left trying to decide if she's a genius or just lazy.

The long and short of it is, she has offered to be any guy's snuggle buddy for the low, low price of $60/hr or the bargain rate of $300 for an entire overnight of snuggling. She does clarify that it's snuggling ONLY and that clothes stay on and no kissing will be permitted. It doesn't say if she's hot or not so I'm not sure how popular her service is.

I guess if my day job doesn't work out, I can always go the snuggle route. Or I can use this as an excuse to reintroduce the wildly popular term "Snuggle Punch" and just smile about how ridiculous this is.

Personally, I prefer a body pillow. It doesn't snore, hog the covers, or get to grabby with me...most of the time!

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

So That's What Cleavage looks like!

Tis the season for baseball, outdoor concerts, and new boobs. Yes I said boobs. I went and got myself a pair yesterday so now I finally look like the woman I feel I am instead of the 12 year old boy that my chest would have had people believing I was. Yahoo for boobs!

Those of you that have hung around here at RG long enough know that my plan all along was to get boobs, but to make my next husband buy them for me as a wedding present. But I'm an impatient creature and decided that I would rather buy them for myself and get on enjoying them sooner rather than later. Maybe I'll just make my next husband pay to play. I'm sure he'd be OK with that. Assuming of course that there will be another husband. Now that I have my boobs, I might just decide to keep it just the two of us. We make quite the couple on our own!

Surgery went perfectly and I actually felt good right after and even better this morning. Minimal soreness, a little swelling, but overall, not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. I was in and out of the surgery center in less than 4 hours from check in to discharge. I love quality, efficient service! And my male nurse and anesthesiologist were both very easy on the eyes so it was a pretty pleasant experience all around.

I'm back to business as usual today with the help of an ibuprofen and half a percocet, although the percocet is more for recreational purposes than for pain at this point.

It will take a few weeks for everything to move into the perfect place as they are put under the muscle and tend to sit high for a little while to the muscle loosens up and there is a little room for them to maneuver from what the doctor says. In the meantime, I can deal with it!

Not my actual cleavage or size, but I thought it was a nice pic to share none the less. Who doesn't like good boobs?  Enjoy!

Friday, April 19, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - There's an Ex-Boyfriend in my Guest Room

Happy SCF all!  It's Friday again. I like that.

This week had me in kind of a weird situation, so you know that I'm going to share with the class.

As you know, I called it quits with Twin in February. Since then, there has been long, drawn out silences, accusations, and a lot of me hurting his feelings even though I didn't want to. I think I had to break up with him like 5 times since then just to reinforce that yes, we are never, ever, ever, getting back together (thanks T Swizzle!).

Since then, we have made a little progress towards him being a little less angry towards me and the heartbreak is numbing out some. Him showing up on my doorstep last week completely unannounced didn't help that at first as my first inclination was to punch him for not respecting my time or space, but once that initial anger passed, we had a decent conversation and he left feeling better knowing that I felt a little bad for breaking up and hurting him.

We left it as we might be able to get back to being friends at some point but for now, I was going to remove myself from his situation for a while so he can get on with getting on. It kind of needs to be that way for both of us right now. We agreed.

And then he called me on Tuesday. And asked if he could stay at my place as a layover on his way to a not-so-close city. I reluctantly agreed. And made sure he clearly knew that he would be posted up in the guest room and my door would be closed.

He arrived, dropped his stuff in the guest room, and then we had a pseudo-awkward hour of TV watching and small talk before I went into my office to finish some work. When I finally went to bed, there was someone in it. He just wanted to relax and talk for a while, which we did, before I kicked him out and banished him back to the guest room. And locked my door.

He left early in the morning to get on with his trip. And then I got a call that night that, low and behold, he was tired and wanted another layover at my place. Again I agreed. Again he was banished to the guest room.

This time he decided he was going to make a plea for "one last night" of he and I being together. His request was denied. I explained to him my reasoning, that it would help either one of us separate and move on from our relationship if we played make believe and acted like we were still together, even for a night.

He pushed back a little, as I expected, but the answer was still no. I'm not easily swayed once I make my mind up. He knows this. And it annoys him.

He left without incident early the next morning and we were polite to each other. Just polite. No need to create confusion where there doesn't need to be any right?

I've often said that I'm the queen of detachment. It's just something that I've been able to do. When I make up my mind that I'm done with someone, I'm done. It's like I can turn off the emotional faucet and that's just that. He's not the same way. He has been dwelling on it, and dwelling is not good. It makes him crazy and then he wants to take me along for the ride. No thanks!

How do you handle break ups? Do you ponder and dwell? Do you just pack it up and move on? 

And of course, the song for today HAD to be this. Sorry!

Friday, April 12, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - The Dating Game

Congratulations, we've made it to yet another "Soft-Core"  Friday!  That is a win in my book!

I told you in a recent post that I was back in the dating game, whether I was excited about it or not, so I thought I would give you all a little update.

Out of the 4 dates I had in 5 days, I still have Bachelor #1 and Bachelor #2 in the rotation. Bachelor #3 turned out to be not only a stalker but a married stalker. I totally knew there was something off with that dude. Glad I shut it down when I did. Bachelor #4 has slipped into the abyss of foggy memories and forgotten names. I hope he's doing well. Actually I really don't care but that's besides the point.

I had date #2 with Bachelor #1 on Wednesday night. We had dinner at the place that Bachelor #4 and I had met at. Hey, what can I say? I like that restaurant! Date #2 was good. We went a little deeper, talking about his work, his upcoming vacation, his family, his work out and nutrition plan, his.... are you tracking here? We talked a lot...about him. At one point, I quit talking and just let him go. It was a minute before he came up for air.

I'm not holding it against him too much. I think he was just still nervous around me. And in his defense, he's kind of a goof ball so we laughed a lot too. I appreciate his sense of humor. And his sparkly blue eyes. He references his self-proclaimed awesome sexual skill set a little too much though. Makes me wonder if he really is over compensating for something. We haven't gotten any where near figuring that out yet nor do I plan to in the near future. Date #3 is pending for the weekend.

As for Bachelor #2, we have date #3 scheduled for tonight. This guy really interests me for some reason. There is nothing really outstanding about him from what I can tell, but he is a solid, normal guy and I'm actually really attracted to that aspect of him. He's a single parent, hard worker, good family guy that has a relatively functional life much like myself. I get where he is coming from and likewise, he can understand my situation as well. There is something comforting in that.

The one thing that remains to be seen is the chemistry aspect. We have great conversation and enjoy being together, but we haven't physically touched yet outside of a hug at the beginning and end of each date so you know that the suspense is killing me!!

I'm not one to normally slow play it on that side of things but it's been kind of fun to wonder how it will shake it. We'll see if we can move things along a little tonight. A good solid make-out against my car will tell about everything I need to know to get a feel for our chemistry potential. I'm hoping for the best, but am cautiously optimistic.

Either way, I've decided to just let things roll and see how and who plays out. Maybe this dating thing isn't so bad after all...

Friday, April 5, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - One Last Push

Happy SCF kids! I hope this week has been lovely for you. For those of you (us) that have had a kid or two home for Spring Break, extra big shots of tequila for you (us)!

I'm trying to remember where I even left off but it's all a little hazy so I'll just start here. I feel like I'm giving this single thing one last big final push and then I'm either A) going to settle into some sort of a relationship again or B) go full blown shenanigans only and forget even attempting to form any type of legit bond with a singular person.

I'm not sure which one I would prefer currently, but I think option A would be the healthier choice for me at this point.

Last week, I went on 4 dates in 5 days. I decided I'm not interested in pen pals or texting buddies and if we don't meet within like a week of initial contact, you are getting deleted and no further effort will be coming your direction. So it was about volume really.

Cranking through a pile of potentially OK guys to weed out the loser/stalker (which one was), who was less exciting than watching paint dry (which one was), who was strung a little tight but ended up fun with potential for future dates (which one was), and who was actually a normal, solid guy who seems to have his shit together and actually seems like someone who could be pseudo-bf material (which one was).

All in all, not a bad ratio as online dating goes. Bachelor #4 actually ended up being a friend of a friend, which I didn't find out until date 2. Upon further investigation via conversation with said mutual friend, he is a legitimate good guy with a solid career and no glaring personality flaws. I consider that a win! We have date #3 pending for early next week so you know I'll keep you posted.

In addition to my modified speed dating shenanigans, I have a couple of new business ventures cooking as well. There is the launch of Random Girl Clothing which is slowly but surely taking shape.

There is also the Elegant Princess Apron Collection which is quickly approaching the end of our Kickstarter launch deadline. Like in the next 24 hours!! It is totally within reach, but I NEED your help to get it there. If you haven't already, please go to our launch page and order yours for your little princess or your big girl princess...hey, we all want to be a princess even when we are grown up!

They are being offered at a great discounted price for the launch and I want to see this go big. I know it will. I know you all will help me make this happen because you are awesome and I LOVE you kids!

Thanks as always for your undying Random Girl support, be it shenanigans or business ventures, I know you guys will always show up for me!

Big Randy kisses to you all!

Friday, March 29, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - Random Girl Swag

Happy Good "Soft-Core Friday" to you all! Hope you are all ready for the Easter Bunny to arrive and bring you lots of eggs filled with deliciousness and sugar!

I'm happy to announce that Random Girl is launching out into yet another new venture...a clothing line! Now you all can  wear Randy around on your know you have been waiting for that!

I'll be giving you more details on the launch of the line shortly but can tell you that it will be more of a cute, sexy dorm wear type line. Think cute tanks and booty shorts, yoga pants, and hoodies and such. Comfy, sexy, sassy stuff. Very much me!

Here's a sneak peek of a few of the ideas we are looking to include in the collection. Let me know what you think. And what you want to order! I can do small custom orders now until the full launch and then we will have expanded colors and sizes to choose from.

Friday, March 22, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - Back to what you know

Happy "Soft-Core Friday" all! Yep, it's back! You may all cheer loudly and make spectacles of yourselves now.

Go ahead, I'll wait.

Feel better? Good!

I told you in my last post that I've given up the whole "girlfriend" gig. Not because anything was wrong, just something missing and I didn't want to delay the inevitable any longer so it's done.

Now what?

What does a girl that has been on lock down for the last 9 months do with herself when she finds herself single again? Well, I'm not sure what a normal girl does, but this girl gets back to getting on with the shenanigans. Was there ever really a question?

In all honesty, it was kind of a daunting task to consider. Putting myself out there again after being in the comfort of a steady relationship. Remembering all the not so fun parts of dating, online dating profiles, awkward first dates, and all those things that come with being a single girl. Lord help me!

But, sometimes you just have dive into the deep end and get yourself distracted with something shiny and new. So I did. Well, technically he wasn't new. We had talked off and on over the last year and a half or so when one or the other of us was between relationships but had never really had a chance to try anything out because the timing just never worked for both of us at the same time. Until now.

We did our usual touch base via text a couple weeks ago and low and behold, we are both finally single. Happy day! Since then, we decided it was long overdue that we spend some quality time together. We even had a date. And have another on planned. Granted, we did things a little backwards but who am I to get caught up in the details?

I don't know that this is the beginning of another round of shenanigans for Randy, but it kind of felt like coming home to a familiar friend after having been all GF'd up for so long. I guess it's true, you always go back to what you know.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Break Ups & Babies

So it's been a while since I sat down and had a good chat with you kids. I hope you are all doing well and springing into this new season with optimistic thoughts!

Let's catch up, shall we?

First things first. I'm no longer a "girlfriend". Yep, I know...shocking right? It's OK really. It was one of those things that just needed to be done. He was one of those guys that looked great on paper and represented even better in real life. He's everything that has been on my "list" and yet...something was missing. For everything that was right, there was that one, intangible thing that was just not there.

I realized that when I thought of next steps, which for us would have been getting engaged and moving in together, I was not excited. Not in the way that someone that was going to start a new life with someone should be. That made me really sad to be honest.

I wanted it to work. I wanted it to be him. It would be so easy and life would be good. But I would feel like I was settling and I want more for him. I want the girl he asks to spend the rest of his life with to be the most excited, happy girl in the world to say yes. And that wasn't going to be me.

He says that he is certain that we would be so good together. He said he is going to leave the door open to me, indefinitely. And that when I get my head out of my ass and realize that we are meant to have a good life together, he wants me to make that phone call because he's still all the way in. I won't be making the phone call. It just wouldn't be fair to either of us.

Yeah, so there's that.

I've been on a few dates since the break up. I'm not really looking to get into anything serious right now but it's nice to have a few shiny new distractions. Although, I feel I'm teetering precariously close to the edge of falling back into full-blown shenanigans mode again. Random Girl might be getting back to her roots out kids!

But in happier news, I get to be a mommy again! I'm super excited. This time, it doesn't come with 9 months of drudgery or stretch marks. This one was easy! And she's super cute.

Here's my new fur baby!

I'll try not to be one of "those" puppy moms and plaster pictures of her all over the place but I make no promises. Look at that face! 

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Want to be a princess? Now you can!

Hello kids! I've missed you all! I've been working on a few things and unfortunately I am more of a one-track mind person when it comes to creative ventures so the blog has been getting the shaft on love and attention from me lately.

So this is something I'm excited about. Really excited about. And I want to share it with you. I've teamed up with a master tailor and a genius fashion designer and we are launching this amazing new apron line, Elegant Princess Aprons. Now I know what you are thinking, "Aprons? Really? What's cool about that?"

Well, I'll tell you. They are beautiful, hand crafted, and based on the 6 best princesses in all the land. They come in adult and kid's sizes and will make your time in the kitchen a magical time in a land far, far away...or at least you can pretend!

Do me a favor and check out our page on KickStarter. That is where we are doing the initial launch and you can order your custom princess aprons and matching hair pieces for you and your little princesses through there at a great promotional price as part of our launch. My daughter can't wait until hers arrives and neither can I! If you need help ordering or have questions, just let me know and I'll help you out!

Also, please like our page on Facebook and follow us on Twitter. Your support is so very much appreciated!

I'd love to hear what you think about this new venture, share please!

Friday, February 8, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - Super Bowl in Vegas: Round 2

Happy Soft-Core Friday to you all! I missed last week because I was too busy trying to shove way too much stuff into a far too small carry on bag so you can imagine how much time that took! Why was I packing, you ask? Because it was time to head to Vegas for Super Bowl again this year...YAHOO!

I had initially declined Blog Boy's invite to do SB in LV part 2 due to logistical issues but as the good travel karma Gods would have it, it ended up working out perfectly and I was able to join in the fun. And fun it was!

Personally, I think this year was even better than last year because we had a smaller group to maneuver and plan around and more time for great food, good fun, and lots of gaming.

I would be afraid to count the number of calories eaten or amount of vodka consumed but I like to pretend that none of that counts since there wasn't a lot of sleep to be had so I needed the extra fuel and liquids right?  I'm sure it all balances it out somehow, or at least that's what I'm telling myself.

The best part of the trip was getting to hang out with Blog Boy. There is just something about him that makes me so happy to be around him and we have so much awesome good travel karma between the two of us, I know there is never anything to worry about because it's all going to be awesome and fun. He really, truly is one of my favorite people.

I also got to see some other friends that are local to the area including my darling Yve from Lazidaisical so that was truly the icing on the cake of an already great couple of days. Vegas is great and all, but it's the people I get to see while I'm there that really makes me love going there now.

Today's SCF song is a little bit of a departure from the norm but I had the privilege of seeing Santana up close and live on this trip and although I was a casual fan prior to seeing the show, I am full blown starstruck now! That man can play a guitar like no one else and it was such an awesome concert! Enjoy his genius!

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

More Girlfriend Perks

In my previous post where I was making note of some of the benefits that I was convincing myself came with being an official "girlfriend" I covered a few of the basics. Since then, I have discovered a few more perks and thought I would share.

GF benefit list continued:

1) Getting off multiple times before I even get out of bed in the morning. I have talked before about the joy of the morning quickie but have recently been reminded of how much of a benefit this truly is when the boyfriend is on the ready and conveniently located beside me in the morning.

2) Getting breakfast made for me afterwards. Yep, that happens in this relationship. I'm not complaining.

3) Not being allowed to walk out when a discussion gets difficult. He doesn't hold me against my will or anything but he does call me out on my shit and makes me stay engaged in the conversation to finish it out instead of doing my hit and run routine as I have done in the past. I hate it and appreciate at it at the same time.

4) Having him get nervous enough before I head out of town for the weekend that he makes a 200 mile drive to see me and make sure that I'm completely satisfied and exhausted before I get on the plane to ward off any shenanigans that may present themselves to me while in his absence. He's a smart one like that!

So the list continues to grow. The benefits package is getting better and I'm enjoying discovering what else is in store for me.

*Updated 10am: Make that breakfast, a dozen roses, and a cute series of notes of all the things he would never change about me. SWOON!

What are your favorite things about being a girlfriend/boyfriend? What special benefits do you take advantage of in your situation?

Friday, January 25, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - Blondes vs. Brunettes Bowl

Happy "Soft-Core Friday" everyone! I figured it was better to get a post up late rather than never and until I opened my e-mail a few minutes ago, I was feeling rather uninspired today.

Luckily, the good folks at Tao, one of my favorite nightclubs in Las Vegas, decided I needed to know about the other big game going down in Vegas on Super Bowl weekend: The Blondes vs. Brunettes Bowl.

Now this is not a simple preference thing here folks, there is some skill and talent required to compete and be declared the victor in this mighty battle. Check out the flyer.

That's's a girl on girl kissing contest. Best kissing pair of blondes or brunettes walks away with smeared lip gloss and $5000. Not a bad little prize for making out with a chick. Unfortunately, I don't fly in to Vegas until Friday...oh darn!

Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The day I was dreading has come

I'm not your usual "mommy blogger" as most of my shenanigan-filled posts would prove, but I love my daughter more than anything and struggle at times to know the right way to handle issues that come along with this most honorable and blessed job.

Today is one of those days.

As I was helping the princess get ready for school today, she put on her clothes, sucked in her stomach, and said "Mom, I feel like I'm..." and because we consider "fat" a not-very-nice word to use, she spelled F-A-T in the air with her finger instead of saying it out loud.

It knocked the air out of me. She's 7.

I had her come sit on my lap and I asked her a couple of questions like why she felt that way. She said that her belly is big and she doesn't like it.

I asked her if she was healthy. She said yes.

I asked her if she made good decisions about what she ate and if she ate healthy. She said yes.

I asked her if she was strong and if her body let her do the things she wanted to do. She said yes.

We talked for a minute about how each person, child or grown up, is made differently. Some are tall, some or short. Some are blonde and some are brunette. Some have blue eyes, some have brown. We are different in many ways and also similar in other ways.

Then I told her that her body is made exactly the way that God wanted her to be and that she was beautiful. That made her smile and then she was ready to brush her teeth and get on with her day.

She didn't make mention of it again. But it has been weighing on my mind really heavily today.

I knew that she would become aware of the differences in her classmates at some point and was hoping that she would just observe and accept that everyone is different, instead of making judgments of "better or worse than" or that being a certain height/weight/look was good or bad in comparison to others.

I was hoping, but I know better than that.

The truth is, she is bigger than most of her classmates. She is taller by a few inches and is solidly built. Not overweight, but not stick thin either. She is just solid. Just like I was at her age. And it was about the same time in my life that I realized, whether I noticed or one of the not-so-nice kids in my class decided to make sure I knew, that I was bigger than the other girls.

I decided that being bigger was "bad" and that I should be self-conscious about it. I should feel like I wasn't as good as the other girls that were thin and tiny and petite. I should be ashamed that I am wearing a bigger size in clothes and shoes and I should just accept that I wouldn't be as good as the other girls because I didn't fit in, literally.

This feeling wasn't a passing thing. It was something that dominated several years of my young life. I always felt like I was a "fat kid" and I still to this day hate to see pictures of myself when I was in that phase. My mom told me the same things that I'm telling my daughter now and I believed her until enough other people told me otherwise long enough and drowned out her positive perspective. I don't want my daughter to go through that but I'm pretty powerless to stop those outside influences from challenging her self-confidence on a daily basis.

When I hit about age 12, I grew another 4 inches and dropped weight to make me more of a tall "normal" girl as opposed to a "bigger" girl but I still always felt out of place. I still do most of the time to be honest with you and even though the logical part of me sees what's in the mirror, the insecure little girl in me still feels like I'm overweight, bigger, and thus "less than" others by comparison.

So my fear as a mother to a little girl that is very much like me, is how do I protect her from feeling the way that I feel about myself when she is 30 years down the road? How do I make today, and the years to come, about how strong and healthy and beautiful she is as opposed to how she is different than other girls? How do I keep my voice from being drowned out by other, louder voices of negativity?

I don't know.

Since she was was old enough to walk and eat solid food, we have focused on her being healthy. Staying active, playing hard, eating lots of fruits and vegetables and very little fast food or unhealthy foods in general. Her dad and I are both active people and we try to eat well, both for our own health, and to model healthy, active lifestyles for her. That is something that neither he nor I had while we were growing up so we want to do things better for our daughter. We don't talk in terms of weight but in terms of being healthy, making good decisions, and keeping our bodies strong. We agree it's the best way to make good decisions a life-long lifestyle for all of us.

The bottom line is that she is her mother's daughter, and as such, she is following in my biological footsteps as she grows and develops. I almost feel guilty about passing my genes down to her because with her dad and I, she was never going to be a tiny little petite girl, it's just not going to happen. I wish I had the tiny little petite girl genes to hand down to her, but I don't. I feel like she is being punished because she got my DNA. It's ridiculous I know. But it's how I feel on days like today.

My daughter is smart, healthy, hilarious, sassy, and beautiful. I hope that at the end of the day, that is what she sees when she looks in the mirror. Today, and every day of her life.

I'm open to any and all ideas from you guys on how I can continue to build her up, secure her self-esteem, and help her navigate the negativity that she is facing and will continue to have to challenge. What helped you when you were growing up to help combat some of the things that made you different? 

Friday, January 18, 2013

"Soft-Core Friday" - Membership has its Privileges

Happy Soft-Core Friday kids! It's my first one in a while so I thought I would make this a little interactive so be prepared to participate OK?

As you know, I've recently decided to be a girlfriend. Now with that esteemed title, I have been taking a look at the benefits package that comes with such a title. After all, there has to be some perks to throwing a label on a person right?

Here's what I have come up with so far:

  • I no longer feel compelled to constantly bust out my cutest nighttime wear. Cute yoga pants have given way to my flannel Ohio State pajama pants. And I'm not apologizing. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't plan to torture the poor guy with big full-coverage nightgowns or footie PJ's or anything quite so unattractive (at least not on a regular basis) so I keep the sexy underthings at the ready. But most nights? He's getting pajama pants.
  • No more online dating. I don't think that requires any further explanation. 
  • An auto-excuse to not attend anything I don't want to attend. I can use the handy "I have plans with my boyfriend" line and it's probably true. 
  • My family has quit worrying about me being single. If they only knew all the other things they should have been worried about over the past few years...
  • Consistently fantastic, on demand sex with someone I actually like being around outside of the bedroom. 
So that's the short list. I'm sure (hoping) that there are more rights and privileges that come along with this gig. 

What are your biggest perks from being labeled a "boyfriend" or "girlfriend"?  What am I not taking full advantage of that I should be? Any major pitfalls I should be looking out for? It's been a long time since I was some one's girlfriend you know?!? 

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Sooner or Later

It was bound to happen. I would come back. I missed you all too much not to come and see what happened at the party while I was away. I always miss the good ones! Anyways, it's been fun doing a quick catch up and I will dive a little deeper and show some comment love soon, you have my word!

In the mean time, I have been out living a little life here and there. A work trip, some quality time with Twin, and refocusing on a few key things like fitness and faith. All good stuff, but giving things my attention really takes a lot of time...and gives me less time to play on the interwebz so that kind of sucks a little.

I've finally decided to quit being such a pain in the ass and just be Twin's girlfriend. No caveat or asterisk to give me an out, leave my options open, and keep me from being really in. That's bullshit and I don't want to play that way any more.

Maybe that's maturity, or maybe it's just common sense. Whatever it is, it was time for me to quit being such a punk and give a little bit more of myself to a quality guy that has put an immense amount of effort into doing things right. I'm not waiting for an excuse to bail or betting that things will go awry. I'm going to give being happy with someone a try and see how that shakes out. Novel idea, I know.

It only makes me a little bit twitchy...

On other fronts, I'd like to get back into this writing stuff a little bit but have been lacking the inspiration (and peer pressure) to do so. I'm looking for someone to pose a good challenge to me so bring it on! Any ideas on how to help me kick my own ass into putting words together again?