Today's "Soft-Core Friday" idea was still brewing in my brain this morning when I got on the Twitters and saw that my darling Alyssa had an issue she wanted me to tackle. Of course, I loved it so off we go!
The answer is yes & no. Helpful right? Let me explain (and I'm talking only from my specific experience on the topic so take it for what it's worth).
If you are in a situation where the two of you started off just as a hook up, like you met on a night out, took a first date to end game, or were basically virtually strangers who decided to have sex when given the opportunity, it might be a little tricky to try to then cool things off and stay strictly in the friend zone. There was no real level of commitment or interest outside of sex to start things off, so there might not be a lot of common ground to base a friendship on after the sex cools off.
It's not impossible, but it's not likely. Unless the two of you had integrated some non-sex time and conversations into your "boy toy" situation, you will probably find yourself bored with him once real life starts to creep into your sex-only situation. However, if you did allow him to share a little and did likewise with him throughout the course of your hook ups, you might find that you actually do like him and what he is about and would be interested in keeping him around as a friend when you aren't in the bedroom.
If you are converting a friend or acquaintance into a boy toy, then the likelihood that you could go back to being friends when the bedroom shenanigans are over is more likely. You already know him and like him and obviously have somethings you can appreciate him, even before sex comes into the picture. Those things most likely won't go away after you have hooked up, although they might evolve a little or get awkward depending on how the sex was. Let's be honest.
In my experience, a friend-to boy toy - to friend cycle happens usually with someone that I value as a friend, we both find ourselves single at the same time and since we already think the other one is awesome we decide to entertain ourselves for a while, and then when one of us starts seeing someone else, it's game off in the bedroom but the friendship remains.
I'm not saying it's normal, I'm just saying that's how it has played out for me in the past. This set up only works if you can both remain emotionally unattached and if you both know that the sex is strictly temporary and for recreation, not an attempt to convert the situation into a full-blown relationship.
Hope that helps a little!
And since I like to include a topic-appropriate with my SCF posts, here is today's. It's pretty perfect for the "boy toy turned friend gone wrong" situation. It's my current "awful but favorite" song. Listen all the way through, it's the last line that kills it.