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Thursday, March 31, 2011

A girl's point of view - The Threesome review continues

Hello kids! I am finally back from my work/pleasure trip and it is very nice to be home! I will be catching up on all of your posts and comments shortly, I promise I am not ignoring you! Welcome to the new Random Girl followers as well, hope you enjoy the craziness!

Just when you thought the threesome theme had run it's course, no wait! Today I have the great privilege of welcoming my lovely friend Chrystal Rose to Random Girl to share with us her girl's point of view on her threesome experiences. If you aren't already following her blog or on twitter, get on it! She is fully Random Girl certified as awesome!

Chrystal, it's all yours babe!


Three’s Company or Three’s a Crowd?

I slid out of Hellcat’s bed and headed for the kitchen, stopping in my tracks at her bedroom door. The living room looked like what rockstars must leave behind for the maids at the hotels they trash. Empty bottles of beer, liquor, condom wrappers, broken glass, pieces of both red and pink fetish tape, empty whippet canisters and their corresponding balloons, and several cigarettes from a spilt ashtray covered the floor.

This is what Threesome Armageddon looks like.

As I tiptoed through the mess, kicking bits of the fetish tape aside as I went, careful not to step on any broken glass—the man on the couch stirred, rolled over and smiled at me. I smiled back and continued my trek to the kitchen in search of something that resembled water to drink. I quickly discovered that all the glasses were either dirty or had been smashed.

Fuck me.

I let the San Diego City water run for a minute before I stuck my mouth in the stream and gulped a solid 16oz down. Somehow I managed to get back and slide into bed next to Hellcat without injuring myself.

At 26 this was my 2nd threesome and it definitely rose the bar several notches from my first. My first had been at 19, though it could technically be called a foursome because we’d called in a 3rd girl to “finish the job.”

As a woman you are more likely to be part of a threesome some time in your life than a man is (statistically the odds are in your favor). The man may have “pressure to perform” in a MFF threesome but essentially he has it made.

As a female there are a few things to consider:

The ideal role is “The Guest Star”

Scenario One:

Female: Friend of mine
Male: Friend of mine with benefits who happened to have a crush on the female

Why it worked: I had zero feelings for him so I was able to walk away having had a fun experience. No jealousy, etc.

Scenario Two:
Female: Friend of mine
Male: Ex-Boyfriend of female

Why it worked (for me): Once again there weren’t any feelings tangled in, so I was able to walk away with a smile on my face.
As a guest star you are invited into the bedroom of another couple (or ex-couple) and can bail when the harsh light of day arrives along with the aftermath. And I really feel that threesomes are best for everyone involved when feelings aren’t.

The Insider

As an insider considering a threesome, there are lots of things to think about. You may be determined to do it, think it’ll be fun and harmless but the reality is you have feelings for this man. You may think it’s no big deal beforehand but you can’t predict your feelings after you watch the man you love get it on with another woman. Once it’s been done, you can’t take it back.

The broken glass from Scenario Two? That wasn’t from fun and games and “oops!” we knocked something over—That was from her launching glasses at him when she had a change of heart AFTER what we’d done. Sure she’d been there encouraging the whole thing, but when it was over she was more than pissed at him.

Can you imagine what might have happened if they were still a couple?

While men can go around sticking it in any hole they wish without feelings of attachment, women are cursed with giving a fuck. This of course doesn’t go for everyone and depends on the circumstances. I’ve had sex like a man and it’s very empowering to not care about them at all. There’s a difference between guys like that and the one I actually love.

Tips For the Insider

  • Make your guest star a true guest star—someone you don’t know. Whether you find her on the adult classifieds or hire an escort, she’ll be out of your life once the job is done.
  • If you know the guest star it’ll help if she is someone who lives pretty far away. It’s difficult to have a girl who’s had sex with your man, hanging around you and especially him all the time.
  • Keep it focused. You don’t have to let this girl sleep over and provide her breakfast the next morning or anything (though a girlfriend of mine did get this sort of royal treatment.) When it’s all said and done, you can say goodbye…and it leaves some room for some twosome action.
  • Make sure you know why you’re doing it, if it’s not a fantasy of yours or something you think you’ll enjoy then don’t do it. He’ll live.
  • Get something out of it. With a guy who’s lucky to have two women and a guest star that’s an outsider—you run the show. Make sure that you’re having a great time and getting what you want out of it. This isn’t a twosome with you as the voyeur (well unless you want it to be of course.)
  • Set ground rules for whatever you don’t feel comfortable with and don’t be afraid to take charge.
  • Relax and have fun!


From a woman’s perspective, threesomes can be a fun experience. Maybe not something you want to do every weekend but a situation worth exploring.

Have fun, be safe and happy threesomes!

If you like my work you can read more at www.xtalrose.com, “Like” me on Facebook/xtalrose or follow me on twitter.com/xtal_rose.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

RED - Studio30 Plus Prompt

Just to keep you all guessing a little, I am going to take yet another departure from the regularly scheduled Random Girl programming and throw a new Studio30 Plus prompt your way. This weeks prompt: Red

If you aren't already hanging out at S30P, get over there and sign up. So much great talent in one place!

Here is my take on it


RED


The sun was red that evening
Not orange, but blazing red
It burned through the haze
Struggling to stay in the sky
Like me
Fighting the inevitable night that would come
Barely over the horizon now
I watched it in my rearview mirror
Driving down the long stretch of black highway
Away from the day
Into the darkness
It was cold and demanding, like you
Not waiting patiently
But taking by force
Again he would have his way
The last blaze of red retreating
Hiding behind the soft curve of the earth
It didn’t want to be a witness to what was to come
That left the darkness
That left him
And that left me with him
I wanted the sun to stay and fight for me
Fend off the approaching night, show its strength
But it was not within either of our control
Do as you’re told
There is no point in protesting
The decision is made
Made for me
Like the fierce red flame
Silenced by a movement
Enveloped in the darkness
You are over me
You control me
The darkness has taken both of us

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Again with the Threesome? Yes, indeed!

I am away for a pleasure/business trip for a few days but never fear, I have plenty to keep you busy with while I'm gone.


I seem to be developing weekly themes here at Random Girl. One week was cheating, this week was threesomes. Who knows what I'll get stuck on next?


Hopefully by now you have all seen my article at The Dude Society about threesomes. That was more of a light hearted take on how a guy can get their girl to consider it without getting slapped. For this installment of Threesome Theater, we will be taking a look at the dynamics of the threesome, the risks and rewards, and some of the emotional aspects that need to be considered in this type of arrangement, FFM/MMF/Swinger, and how to best manage some of the challenges that can come in these awesome yet complicated scenarios. Thanks to author of Monogamy Sucks George Pappas and James Holeva "The Wingman" for their input and expertise on this one. 


Down for a Threesome? Read This First! 

Any good porno worth its weight in… well, you know, features a threesome. This long sought after  two to one ratio scenario has rocked the world of many a guy for far too long. It is almost the holy grail of sex. To achieve the threesome means sexual greatness. I would venture to say that it is on 99% of all guys bucket lists. Just an educated guess.  But not all threesomes are the same.


The Two Girl/One Guy Threesome (FFM)
The most common threesome scenario/fantasy is the one featuring two lovely ladies and one lucky guy.  Preferably two lovely ladies that rock it like porn stars, but really any two ladies will most likely do.

Rules of Engagement
Any time sex goes from one-on-one to a threesome, the normal rules of engagement need to be revised a bit to avoid confusion, jealously, or disappointment. George Pappas, author of the novel Monogamy Sucks which examines one man’s adventures as a swinger, highlights the importance of communication when dealing with this specific exciting, yet sensitive arrangement
.
Some key things to be discusses prior to engaging in a two girl/1 guy love fest? What does everyone like to do? Will someone feel left out? What if a woman likes to give blow jobs and another doesn't? Will the women also be open to going down on each other and he watches or will he be able to participate and have sex with one while the other performs oral sex on her female friend? Will a guy be able to have sex w both women?
Pappas warns, “Jealousies can even flair up in casual encounters so everyone has to feel they are having fun and participating.” By taking the time to set expectations and communicate concerns, all three of you can enjoy a more fulfilling experience.

Risk vs. Reward
The biggest reward to living out the two girl/one guy scenario is that you have been fantasizing about it for much of your life.  What could be better that making a dream come true right? It is your opportunity to have simultaneous stimulation in a way that isn’t possible any other way.  Plus, you get to fulfill another fantasy of seeing two beautiful women pleasing each other in the process. To get the inside track on how women know how to please each other can give you some great material to use in future one on one sexual situations.

The downfall of living out this scenario is that it comes with a tremendous amount of pressure as James Holeva, otherwise known as The Wingman  points out. Through his expansive personal experiences, he says the following of the two girl/one guy set up: “The greatest difference is the pressure. For many guys pleasing one woman is a high pressure task, you add a second broad to the mix and you have the responsibility of a Don in the middle of a mafia war.”

Holeva also points out that the real life version of the threesome doesn’t always live up to the fantasy you have been harboring for so long. He says, “I find guys are often disappointed by their first threesome with two girls. It's this fantasy for so long that so much anticipation is involved that guys expect too much.” His advice for overcoming this disappointment and making the best of the situation? It’s in the mindset.   “Don't stress, don't worry, don't freak out... You're banging two chicks. What could be better?”

 The Two Guy/One Girl Threesome (MMF)
The second, less common version of the threesome fantasy for most men is the two guy/one girl scenario.  The biggest hang up while considering this scenario seems to come from the opportunity for some uncomfortable maneuvering of the two guys such as touching of body parts in transition and just the general unease of being naked with another dude even if it is for the purpose of having sex with a woman.

Rules of Engagement
The key to a successful two guy/1 girl scenario is communication, even more so than in the two girl/1 guy set up.  Pappas again stresses the importance of communication in this scenario but adds the critical factor that this type of arrangement must be driving around pleasing the female participant.
Pappas writes: "What needs to be uncovered? Her fantasies and preferences according to Pappas.  “Does she want to be fucked from behind while performing oral sex? Does she want to suck both of them off? Does she want to be double penetrated? Or does she just want to be fucked by both of them as they trade off in between blow jobs."

And while it is a given in most two girl/one guy threesomes that the girls will be acting upon each other in a sexual way, there may be different rules when it comes to the two guy/1 girl situation. Pappas says, “This is tricky - does she want the two men to be together while she watches. This is a complete turnoff for straight men, but it has to be discussed up front. If you say you’re a straight male from the start this is no problem. If you’re a bi-male then that can added to your activities.” This is one caveat to the threesome that you don’t want there to be any misunderstanding on what the boundaries are from the get go.

Risk vs. Reward
The reward for this scenario is two-fold. One, you know that you are giving your woman an extraordinary amount of pleasure and sensation with the help of the other guy and will probably be one of her most memorable sex moments for her. Secondly, as Holeva points out, having another guy there in a supporting role really takes the pressure off of you. His take on it? “As for two guys, while not quite as sexy for a straight man, it's a real team effort, which really takes the pressure off. Support your wingman and great things could be accomplished. When one has ran out of ammo use your wingman to keep firing while you sneak into the corner to reload your weapon.”

The biggest drawback to the 2 guy/1 girl threesome, as mentioned above, is a general lack of comfort level when it comes to the thought of being naked with another guy and working in very close proximity to each other’s penises. While you are both working for the same end result, deciding who goes where and when can cause some logistical concerns to say the least. To help combat this awkwardness, Holeva recommends taking the teamwork approach and utilizing a quick huddle prior to commencing the activities to make sure you two guys are on the same page. As he outlines communication and  a good game plan can make this work for all of you. Decide who will be starting in what position first. Communication with each other on when to switch, if one of you needs a tag out to, um, reload, and have a time out protocol for if at any point someone ventures into forbidden territory. 

Swingers – Another type of Threesome
The threesome scenarios discussed above were in the context of casual relationships, not situations where two of the participants were an established couple or husband/wife.  Those nuances create a situation for swinging, where an additional person, male or female, is introduced into the established couples sexual realm.  There are some special considerations to be taken in the swinging lifestyle and I will cover those more in detail in an upcoming article.

So there you have it kids, the lowdown on all things threesome related. You are welcome!  

Friday, March 25, 2011

Soft-Core Friday - My Two Favorite Things

Sorry kids, this will be a short "Soft-Core Friday" post as I am getting ready to jet off for a fun-filled weekend in Dallas. The birthday party continues for Random Girl!

This video is the winner for today's "Soft-Core Friday" because it combines my two favorite concepts: Fireman and Lil' Wayne. The Fireman part is easy enough to figure out based on my previous posts featuring my own Fireman adventures.

The Lil' Wayne part will probably be harder for some of you to get. Hell, I don't even get it but I have mad love for all things about this man. I know, it makes no sense but it is what it is. And April 12th I will be front row to see him in all of his gansta' glory. I.Can't.Wait! Consider this the pregame.  So I guess maybe I'm the only one that will really appreciate this version of Soft Core but it is still my birthday week so I am giving this to myself as a present. Yum!

And for those of you that my not be a fan of Lil' Wayne (gasp!) I am putting in a little extra hot Firemen only montage for you to enjoy. You can thank me later ladies! Plus it's set to Kings of Leon "This Sex is On Fire" which is sexy on a whole different level.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Return of the Threesome - Random Girl at The Dude Society

Yes kids, it's back. The threesome! Based on the events, or not, of last weekend I have been writing a bit about threesomes. The Dude Society has my latest article up. You should go check it out. Now. I'll wait for you...go ahead, it's OK...

Back? Good! So what did you think? Let me know kids! And don't forget to show me some comment love at The Dude Society so they know how hard I rock and how awesome I am... right?!?

I have another much more detailed and informational post around the dynamics of threesomes and some of the risks vs. reward scenarios to consider in all types, FFM/MMF/Swinger, and how to best manage some of the challenges that can come in these potentially awesome yet complicated scenarios. Thanks to author of Monogamy Sucks George Pappas and to James Holeva "The Wingman" for their input and expertise on that one. It will be posted soon here at Random Girl. It was deemed a bit too racy for The Dude Society so you know it must be a really good one! Look for that one to come out on Sunday here.

In the meantime, here is a sneak peek of my latest The Dude Society article

Want A Threesome? How To Bring It Up Without Getting Smacked!



Any good porno worth its weight in… well, you know… features a threesome. This long sought after two-on-one scenario has rocked the world of many a guy for far too long. It is almost the holy grail of sex: To achieve the threesome means sexual greatness. I would venture to say that it is on 99% of all guys’ bucket lists, just an educated guess.  So how do you bring it up to your girl without getting smacked?


Random Girl goes Salsa Dancing

So what could be more random than Salsa dancing on a Tuesday night? How about me Salsa dancing on a Tuesday night in a makeshift studio in the upstairs of a pizza and beer joint? That is exactly how I spent my Tuesday night and I must tell you kids, I had a heck of a good time.  Now I have no problem dancing under normal club circumstances, I have natural rhythm and I can shake my ass with the best of them, but this was my first concerted effort at actual real deal dancing with a partner (unless I count the time in NYC when my gf and I got caught in the middle of a swing dancing conference and ended up hijacked on the dance floor for the entire evening, but I digress).

So it started off innocent enough. Boys on one side, girls on the other. Very Junior High dance-ish. The instructors led us through several series of 8 counts and then had us put it all together with a partner. This is where things got interesting. The line up of men was not what I would have considered ideal by normal going-out standards. There was a good mix of ages and builds but overall the group was nothing to get excited about. We took turns with different partners and switched it up throughout the night so we could get used to different dance styles. And I must say I was pleasantly surprised. There were a few very unassuming looking guys that had some very convincing swagga on the dance floor. Good hip action, not afraid to lead, aggressive when they needed to be. I started to have impure thoughts about one of them halfway through the Bachata. I just kind of smiled and kept it to myself though. Afterall, I was there to learn, not hook up right? But there is always next week....
If you have interest in learning the Bachata or just want to imagine me doing it, here is a link for you .. have fun! Bachata Lesson

Also, don't forget!
There are a few new posts coming from me over at The Dude Society so make sure you check it out daily. There is a lot of great info to be found there, not just my stuff.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Threesomes, Haters, and Tequila

It was quite a weekend for Random Girl. I am exhausted for a number of reasons, but I will keep that myself.
It was full of highs and lows, and few situations that I am still undecided on.

For one of the highlights, several of my bestie girls, some from as far back as elementary school, drove in from various locations and had a girls night in my honor. It was a great reminder of how lucky and blessed I am to have such wonderful long-time girlfriends, who let me drink massive amounts of tequila and make sure I get home safe as well. Truly priceless!

For the low point, I got a truly heinous and sick comment on my blog from my "Soft-Core Friday - Oops..I did it again" post. It was on my randomgirlblog.com site, not my blogger site but it was the same content so I am not sure what set this person off but it included comments about him F'ing my mom last night and that he was coming for me tonight. It also included a lot of other sick things. Very disturbing. Obviously I deleted it as soon as I saw it but it has still made me slightly sick to my stomach to think about it.

As for the toss up of the weekend, that would be the latest development regarding Fireman, the main character in my Oops.. I did it again post if you recall. It is nothing new for he and I to venture into interesting territory on a regular basis. No two hook-ups are ever the same for us. That is part of why we are so cracked out on each other when it comes to that. So I shouldn't have really been surprised when we ended up in threesome territory right? Well, I was surprised. We had talked about it in theory, he of course wanting to bring in another girl (what guy wouldn't try for that right?). But the proposal he brought to me this weekend was for me...bringing another guy in with us. I know it was just for me because this guy has no fantasies about man action for himself, trust me. I certainly never expected that little gift to be brought to my doorstep completely unsolicited. What is a Random Girl like me to do in such a situation? Well, what else could I do..... but keep you all wondering about if/what/how it shook out. I'll let you use your imaginations and try to decide if I am dealing with rewards or regrets and if it is because I didn't... or I did. Fun right?!?

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Random Girl Does Poetry - Your Memory Haunts

Just for a change of pace this weekend, a post that has nothing to do with anything related to sex. Let's see how many followers I lose out of sheer disappointment. Fear not kids, I will be back to my regularly scheduled programming soon. In the meantime you can catch my randiness at The Dude Society if you just can't wait.


Your Memory Haunts

Your memory has been haunting me
I wish you would just leave
Take your words and your love
Take your smile and your heart
And just go

You left but you still linger here
In my thoughts
In my mind
In my dreams
I love you but I can’t have you here any more

You were not good for me
You were so much more
And you were too much
And I was not enough
And we could never work
So just leave

You loved me dangerously
You overpowered me
No longer myself
But part of you
Under your control

Your control was not love
It was wicked and sick
Crushing who I was
To make me who you wanted

I was wrong, always wrong
Impatience with my ignorance
You tolerated me only momentarily
And then you forced me to submission

It was only your way, no other
To strangle with twisted love
To beat with deceitful words
Making me concede defeat

Your need to be right
Your need to control
Your need to take me
You need to take me over

You memory has been haunting me
I wish you would just leave

Friday, March 18, 2011

Soft-Core Friday - Oops...I did it again

In the immortal words one Ms. Britney Spears, Oops.. I did it again.

I was trying to ween myself off of Fireman (you all remember him right?) but alas, I have failed miserably.  I am like a crack addict when it comes to that boy. I call him a boy because I am 8 years older, soon to be technically 9 years older, than he is. Really. That is ridiculous. But it appears that I have spoiled him to the point that now he won't go away, which is OK because he has spoiled me right back if you know what I mean.

So why is this such an "Oops" situation? Because now Fireman has gone and gotten himself a girlfriend. This in and of itself is not a problem as our intention was clearly never to have a relationship beyond the bedroom (or stairs, or bathroom, or garage, or... well you get the picture) but here is where the problem lies. She is staying with him quite often. And he stills comes to see me. Like sneaks out while she is asleep. Or tells her he is sick so she leaves and then comes over.  It really is none of my business. But it kind of is right? And yet, I am OK with it, encouraging it actually. All I have to do is say the word, and he is on his way. Really.

So here is how I see this going. He will either A) feel guilty and eventually tell her or B) Get busted straight up by his girl. Either way what does that mean for me? A complete pain-in-the-ass situation? Yes, I believe it will. I should pull the plug right? I should tell him to quit being a punk and either man up or ditch his girl. But I won't. Because the sex is good and that's all I want him for. I didn't ask to become the "other woman", he created the situation so he can deal with the fall out right? I was there first.  All I can say is....BOYS!

In honor of my boy and his drama and my on-going bad decision, today's "Soft-Core Friday" video is Ms. Britneys' "BOYS"  because they are nothing but trouble for this girl!

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Green Beer? Ok!

Happy St. Patrick's Day kids! Hope you all are enjoying the festivities and pretending you are Irish. Shout out to the true Irish loves, Kat & Heather! Do your homeland right ladies!

New stuff coming from Random Girl @ The Dude Society soon. In the meantime, check out my take on sex toys, porn stars, and cell phone smut. Remember, Randy loves comment love there too so show me some ok kids? It's a holiday! *MWAH*




Articles by Lisa


About the author

Lisa, aka Random Girl, is a mild-mannered professional by day, wickedly clever blogger/sex goddess/smartass by night. Lisa has very little internal filtering and is the voice behind Random Girl Blogs. She also makes fantastic chocolate chip cookies.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Random Girl Has Been Getting Busy - at The Dude Society

Are you sick of me yet? Probably. But too bad!
Random Girl has been a busy little bee lately, writing for this blog, Studio 30 Plus prompts, The Red Dress Club, and most recently The Dude Society.

I just wanted to take a moment to say a big "THANK YOU!" to you all for the overwhelming support and comment love you have shown me, both here and at The Dude Society.  I am still proving myself to the editor there so any comments, feedback, love you would like to throw my way on any of the articles I have published there to date are awesome!

Here is a review of everything that has been published thus far at The Dude Society. Next up to publish is "First Time Sex Etiquette". Should be up this week.  If you have any topics you would want me to cover that would be appropriate for a mens magazine, let me know and I will add it to my list.

Big Randy kisses to you all **MWAH**!!


Articles by Lisa

About the author

Lisa, aka Random Girl, is a mild-mannered professional by day, wickedly clever blogger/sex goddess/smartass by night. Lisa has very little internal filtering and is the voice behind Random Girl Blogs. She also makes fantastic chocolate chip cookies.