Thursday, December 29, 2011

Day 28 & Day 29 of #reverb11 - Forgiving myself and Shaking it Up

It's hard to believe that there are only two more days to go in the reverb11 has been an awesome thing to be a part of and I'm so glad that my sunshine Rita sold me on it. That girl has some great ideas!

Day 28: Forgiveness - What one thing do you need to forgive yourself for this year?
I am far from perfect. I can be selfish, clueless, and more than a little abrasive at times. I know all of this. But I do hate to hurt people's feelings with my words or my actions. 

You all know how much I enjoy my shenanigans and all, but there are times when I will take it there for selfish reasons knowing that ultimately, it will end up hurting the person on the other side of the equation. And yes, I know we are all consenting adults and no one is requiring arm twisting to get tangled up with me, but I do regret my situation with my friend I refer to as "long-suffering T". Here's the story on him in case you need a refresher or weren't along for the ride at that point. 

I still hold a pretty decent pile of guilt over creating that situation because I knew that it couldn't be a casual or simple thing with us and I knew his feelings were already involved and I would be creating a more complicated situation that just would not end well. But I did it anyways. 

I guess now is as good as time as anyways to own it, accept it, forgive myself for it, and let it go. 

Day 29: Shaking Things Up - Looking towards 2012, what can you do to shake things up a little next year?
This question has me thinking up all sorts of fun and devious things that I could employ to just flip the script on my regular not-super-exciting situation.In reality though, I will probably explore some more practical ways to make things look different in 2012 than they did in the current year. 

Most likely, 2012 will see me pursuing an opportunity that will take me in a new direction with my career, and may come with a relocation requirement at some point. There are many unknowns still and any type of change, especially one that require a move of any distance, would be especially tricky but I'm finally excited again about my prospects and the chance to change my story a bit. 

Bring it on 2012, bring it on!


  1. My question is, are you and T still friends like before of have you parted ways? If you're still friends, forgive and forget and enjoy the friendship. If not, forgive and forget.

    2012 is going to be our bitch! =]

  2. When someone is excited about their prospects, as you say you are, all kinds of things become possible. Maybe not everything of course, but I am glad you are looking forward to 2012, and might have the chance to reboot a few things.

    Even your attempt to forgive yourself could be a way of shaking things up, in your soul, for 2012.

  3. Forgiveness can be easy to give to others, but it always seems harder to forgive ourselves. Even for things that seem simple or easy in others. Acknowledging it is the first step.

    And I hope to kick 2012 right in the balls and leave it kneeling before me. Fingers crossed for the both of us.


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