Friday, September 23, 2011

"Soft-Core Friday" - Truth, Honesty, Love, & Acceptance

This "Soft-Core Friday" is going to be a little bit different than my normal humorous take on my Friday postings so I hope you all don't mind and will ride along with me. I have a point, I promise.

As most of my fellow American's know, the Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT) act has officially ended. For those of you who aren't familiar with it, basically it was a policy that didn't ban gays and lesbians from serving in the military as long as they didn't admit they were gay or lesbian. Yeah, let that sink in for a minute. Basically you were allowed to fight for other's freedoms as long as you chose to deny your own sense of self to do so. Thanks for that.

This was a big move to do away with DADT. Whereas in the past, if you were found to be gay while serving, that was a violation of military code and you could essentially be discharged for it, losing your career and benefits for no other reason than for what gender you found yourself attracted to.

Ending DADT is not without controversy. There are strong arguments for both sides of upholding and doing away with it but now the decision has been made and there is new set of policies surrounding gays serving in the military and their rights. I personally think it is long overdue and a good decision but I respect those who disagree with my opinion.

Politics and opinions aside, it brings me to my point today. Finding the courage to be truthful about who you are, honestly telling those you love about that truth, and being accepted unconditionally is a beautiful thing.

This video shows one active duty military member struggling to find the courage to come out to his dad shortly after DADT ended this week. You can see the anguish and uncertainty he is fighting against as he dials the phone and begins that conversation. And you can also see the flood of relief as his father offers his unwavering love and support, no matter what.

This is what it's about kids. Being allowed to be truthful, and finding love and acceptance within that truth. It's not  about gay or straight or right or wrong or any of those arguments, it's about being loved for being who you are.

It's a little long and pretty heart-wrenching to watch but it's something worth seeing.  Here's to hoping we all can find our truth, be accepted regardless, and be loved through it.


  1. The first thing I typically do on a Friday morning is dial-up the SCF from my fav. blogger and start reading. Today's post hit home on a bi-lateral front as I can relate to both topics in RG's most recent post. I spent over a decade of my life wearing the uniform which is a symbol around the world for freedom, liberty, and equality. While some of America's finest have an issue with the repeal of DADT the majority don't care, for when your life is on the line, the last thought which crosses your mind is whether or not the person next to you is straight or gay and any homophobic tendencies which may have previously been the butt of jokes and smart-ass remarks are crippled. I feel love has no gender and those who risk there life on a daily basis shouldn't have to hide who they are attracted to, as they deserve the same liberties and freedoms as the rest of the American population. I witnessed this struggle for the brunt of my military career as I have friends, men and women alike, who are gay, but were afraid of 'coming-out' as there were long-lasting repercussion's which not only would put there military career in jeopardy, but also the chance of having a 'normal' life.
    For the naysayers out there who claim that you just 'don't get it' are hiding behind the wall of change. Whether we like it or not our country is as diversified as it has ever been. Unfortunately, as a society we are filled with hatred and racism for anyone who doesn't have the same genetic make-up and believe in the same ideas as we do. I commend those who take the risk and open up to there family and friends about who they are. We shouldn't be afraid of who we are and especially not afraid of who we love.

  2. I got goosebumps - wow.
    I'm all teary. Whatta dad!
    Wanna tell mom for me? HAHAHA - I think she already knows, really.

  3. It's interesting how this is going to play out. Will it strengthen or weaken or military solidarity over the next few years? Time will tell.

    DADT is one of the many laws that needed changing. One down, a lot to go. The problem I see is the precedent. When it's "This is the way it is" for such a long time, the stigma of change can be a jarring thing...

    Emotional video. I also smiled when I saw the naval officer marrying his partner in uniform. The freedoms we are fighting for just got a little more "real" for a good percentage of soldiers...

  4. DADT was wrong and I think it is great that it has been done away with at long last, if you are fighting for your country then it doesn't matter if you are gay. Yes some parents have a problem with a child being gay I am not one of them if one of my daughters(2nd daughter)was to tell me she was gay I would not be surprised and it would not efect how much I love her..........

  5. "It's not about gay or straight or right or wrong or any of those arguments, it's about being loved for being who you are."


  6. Yup. Being true to self is what it's about and feeling safe to do so makes it much easier. Thanks for posting this. The unconditional love displayed here was truly touching.

  7. Saw this on a show the other day and got all teared up. That is such a beautiful reaction. Thanks for sharing it, Randy. So glad to be back!!

  8. Absolutely love this post! I saw the video on GMA last week and I was holding my breath when he called his dad to tell him. I hope this paves the way for others who are afraid or ashamed of who they are to come out and tell.

  9. This was a nice change of pace for SCF, love. This kid looks so much like my bestie, who is also a gay man, that it just wrenches me even more.

  10. I can only comment on the post because I'm at work and this PC can't run 'Flash' so I'm missing out on a portion of that glorious 'www' experience that we've all grown to know and love.

    I'm loving the words though as they give light to the fact that we're human beings and why should we be dictacted to in terms of who we love and why we love them.

    If I say (on Facebook) that I love a show hosted by a gay or lesbian person I'm questioned, the same as when I say that someone is flippin' awesome and they are not hetero.
    I've been called 'gay' because I love skating! Go figure ...

    Love what you love I say, and don't bother with what anyone else has to say about it.

  11. a perfect post. it's embarrassing that our nation had to even wait this long for DADT to be repealed, but it's a beautiful day now that it has. live and let live, love and let love. great post, randy


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