True or False?
I say true.
Whether you admit it or not, male or female, you have a super secret tally sheet in your head where you keep track of hash marks in the column for "things he/she does right and/or that make me feel good" and a column for "things he/she does wrong or that pisses me off".
I do. Only it's not super-secret. I put it right out there verbally, usually in a joking manner as situations present themselves, but I put it out there none the less. No shame in my game. I don't think there is any point trying to pretend that I don't have some sort of system of keeping track of my overall satisfaction or concern with a relationship at any given point of time. And I always have ample evidence and specific examples of why I am giving credit or deducting a point.
And he does too. And I know it. And we can reference it and have a good laugh over "scoring points" or "getting demerits" in a humorous way while still knowing that what we do and how we act towards each other is important and that it does matter.
It's not about holding a grudge or trying to impress one another, it's about keeping each other accountable for being considerate and thoughtful, working hard at making each other happy, and keeping a sense of play and humor to the ups and downs that naturally occur when you are trying to do life with someone on a fairly regular basis.
Do you have a system of "keeping score"? Is it super secret or widely acknowledged in your relationship?
Credit needs to go to my buddy Brandon at Lost In Idaho for putting this post idea in my head. He left a great comment on my Next Level post and brought up the points system... you can