Thursday, July 14, 2011

Soft-Core Friday- Safe is Sexy, Worry is not

Usually my Soft-Core Friday posts are a little silly, slightly to majorly inappropriate, and pretty surface.

This Soft-Core Friday I wanted to give a little attention to something that makes sex that much Depending on your circumstances, safety may be a concern of varying levels. Those in long term monogamous relationships with permanent birth control already confirmed... I envy you. For others of us, "safety" comes in various forms and degrees.

I have done my posts on the great condom debate, and how if it weren't for my insistence in many cases, it would be considered totally optional and thus skipped. Then there is the double safety freak angle that I have discussed as well in the past, which is the combo of condoms and some other form of pregnancy preventing measure like the pill.  Can you tell I'm paranoid?

Well for the sake of full disclosure, which I always have been determined to maintain here at Random Girl, I had a moment of weakness recently and allowed for one option to be forgone, multiple times. I know, I know.... not a good decision. I make no excuses. My logic was that I had been with this guy for quite a while, had a level of trust, and had a back up measure all squared away to prevent disaster of the embryonic variety.

And then it started. The panic. The regret. The "What the hell was I thinking??" And then something else started.... extremely sore boobs, nausea, and a general feeling that something was "off". I had felt that feeling before... when I was pregnant for the princess many years ago. I knew pretty much immediately that I was pregnant for her. Like minutes after conception I think. This, my friends, was not good.

So I found myself at the pharmacy doing something I hadn't done in years... buying an early detection pregnancy test. Not my finest moment. I got home, did as the instructions told, and proceeded to live through the longest 3 minutes in history as I awaited the results.

Tick...tock.... I look? Do I not look? What if it is? What if it isn't but I really am and it is just too early to tell? No I can't be! But I totally could be! I am such an idiot!  And so on and so forth, you get the picture.

I took a deep breath and finally looked. 1 line. That's good. 1 line means no baby. Hooray! But it was early. So I got the joy of repeating the process 2 additional times over a course of a week. Each time was as gut wrenching as the first. In case you couldn't tell, 2 lines for me right now would be a very very bad thing.

Finally, things resumed their normally scheduled programming and it appears that I have dodged the proverbial bullet. But not without a very strong reminder of a lesson I learned long ago. Shame on me for being irresponsible with myself. 2 lines would have changed everything for me in the worst possible way.

The scenario, which was still pending when my Happy MomentsNot So Happy Moments posts hit earlier this week, did at least serve as some real-life inspiration, not sure of that's good or bad.

What caused the prego-like symptons? Who knows....I'm guessing the overwhelming sense of panic of my realized too-late stupidity. Not a situation I plan on recreating any time soon.

So in honor of making better decisions going forward, let today's post be a gentle reminder that it only takes once.... wrap it up! And have fun doing it...Durex has some helpful visuals on how to accomplish this if you are interested...

Ever had a pregnancy scare? What did you do while waiting it out? Unplanned turned out to be your best gift or worst nightmare?  Share kids!

Oh and for the record, this is my test, well one of them at least.... 1 line....hooray! 


  1. I can top this one. Back when I was dating my ex wife, I had decided on a day to dump her and force her to move out of my place. The day before I had picked to move her out, she found out she was pregnant. I stayed with her and did the right thing and it burned me. You wanted a scare, and well this was a damn horror movie for me.

  2. Been there. Done that. Got many grey hairs to prove it. That 2 minutes waiting for the line (please let there only be one line!!!) feels like an hour.

    Happy it turned out the way you wanted it to.

  3. YAY YOU! FOR NOT BEING PREGNANT! Yep. I'm with you on that one. a great way to learn the lesson is to have to take the morning after pill. GROSSNESS! Thanks for sharing RG. xo

  4. I have had one scare but for the most part am a safety girl. I cannot take the pill because the artificial hormones give me migraines so condoms are the only option for me. There have been times where in the moment I went without and just didn't give a fuck. Honestly the worry isn't worth the sex. I do not ever want children so I feel I should be responsible enough to make sure I don't get pregnant. It's not always sexy to stop and roll one on...but it is worth it.

    YAY for not being knocked up!

  5. Congratulations! You're NOT expecting. You have got to be more careful. I have to use condoms, I don't want any surprises (baby or other).
    Neat condom puppets.

  6. One time I thought I was preggo. But I'm a dude, so I wasn't

  7. Two words. Snip snip. ;)

    Yeah, danger ahead...

  8. I'm glad you got the results you were hoping for. I can't take the pill due to wacky health issues. I've never taken it. EVER. So in order for me to have safe sex, I MOST DEFINITELY make sure that sucker is wrapped up tight! I did have a scare though, many, many, many years ago (back when I used to have sex) and I ended up having to take the Morning After pill. I felt lower than the scum of the earth.

  9. Ok everybody, listen up, because I’m only gonna’ say this once!

    Condoms. Feel. Weird.

  10. Only one time was I in that position and he's almost 30 years old now. It was the best decision I ever made even though I was 20 and single. No regrets whatsoever. I picked a really great Dad for him.

  11. I am really struggling to be appropriate here.

    Condoms are awesome. I've learned to love em. Does it feel as good? No, but I feel fantastic knowing I'm not going to have to teach a son about his wanker.

  12. I'm glad you got the results you wanted!!

    I was thinking about the fact that I'll never have that scare again, though I've been there once. Thanks to a doctors mistake I'll never have a baby, so whether a mistake or not cherish the fact that you have the right to choose because that was taken from me. And nothing will ever fill that void.

  13. As soon as we're done with the babies, Mr Ixy will be visiting the doctor. We did find one brand that wasn't too bad, but still - like holding a glass of water instead of dunking your hand right in the cup. But hotter.

    That said...the worry is absolutely not worth it. Wrap yer wacker before you wack her! (sorry don't know what got into me there haha)

  14. So it appears that by an overwhelming majority, we are all agreeing that safe is good. For the rest of you, good luck and God speed.

    I had someone question why I would put this experience out there, that normally when someone thinks they might be pregnant and doesn't want to be, they keep it on the DL, stay private with it.

    Here is my thinking on that. First, I share all of my fun shenanigans with you all so it is only fair that I share the consequences and worries that sometimes come with that behavior as well. It's not always just fun and games, for me or anyone. There are risks to the type of things that I choose to do, and those risks are increased when I make stupid decisions on top of that. So I own what is mine to own and hope that sharing this experience will help someone think twice before taking the same risks with herself/himself. Consider this your Random Girl PSA.

  15. As my friend Belinda Swallows said: "The only alternative to a condom is to make sure that darn thing is outside you when it goes off."

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