Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Inappropriate Randy? No! It can't be!

So I asked my sweet Kat to give me a topic to create a post around today as I am suffering from a lack of self-induced inspiration. She did me right as I knew she would. Back to the sex, kids! You may thank Kat for that.
Here is my inspiration from Kat today via twitter:  Keeping w/ ur randy blog theme (wink wink) idea 4 a blog post is most inappropriate time u became randy & how u handled it.

Here it is kids,
Inappropriate, yes I am. Or at least I can be. But not in the usual ways. I don't speak out of turn, use obsessive profanity in public, or dress like a hooker. Well, not all of the time anyways. I can be inappropriate in many other ways. Most of which lately however, seem to involve ridiculously younger men.

To accept Kat's challenge, I must make a confession to you kids as my most inappropriate time I became randy  and how it was handled has up to this point been locked away tightly in my scandal vault. Call Geraldo Rivera boys and girls, because we are cracking into that bitch right about now.

I love everything about Chicago. The city, the people, everything. I especially love Chicago immediately following a Cubs game. Wrigleyville is out of control and totally alive. Tens of thousands of people line the streets, the bars are packed to capacity, and if they won, it is no-holds-barred for the level of craziness that will ensue.

It was Memorial Day weekend a year ago when I found myself in quite the predicament in a post-Cubs victory night in Wrigleyville. My long-time friend S, who luckily lives nearly 6 blocks from said festivities,  and I were out enjoying the craziness. We were dancing and drinking and flirting as only we can when I happen upon a group of 20-somethings that seemed to be having an equally good time.  It was mere moments before the darling boys had set upon us. Despite throwing down his best game, big brother came up short on the charm. It was little brother that caught my eye. He was a dead ringer for Ryan Reynolds. Yes ladies, THAT Ryan Reynolds. People's Sexiest Man Alive Ryan Reynolds. I had to. How could I not?

Within moments, we had established that he was entirely too young for me but that neither one of us was overly concerned with that fact in that moment. He was in college for Christ's sake. He had roommates. Really? Didn't matter. Within the hour we were up against the wall in a dark corner in the back of the bar and there might as well have not been anyone else there because we couldn't have cared less who was watching.

Playing the role of the classy older woman ( I know, a stretch at this point right?) I suggested we take our festivities to somewhere with a better view. My friend S was on the third floor of a five story brownstone that just happened to have the most amazing rooftop view of the skyline and was open to the whole building as it also had a community greenhouse on the roof . Within minutes we were sneaking up the back stairwell of the building, giggling like teenagers (which makes sense considering he basically was one), and preparing to take in the view of the city.

There were more than stars and city skylines enjoyed from that rooftop on that chilly night. It is safe to say that I blew his mind that night and gave him something to remember long into his late twenties.

So there you have it kids, hope you enjoyed my most inappropriate randy moment (at least thus far) and appreciate the task I faced in narrowing it down to just one. Randy girl is back to the sex posts. Thanks for the great challenge Kat! #Katrocks


  1. Loved this! I haven't been to Wrigley in years. I totally have had the occasional fantasy about younger guys (one of whom was the son of my boss at my last job and WAY too young for me. We're talking just turned 18.) but have never acted on it. Applause for showing that kid just what women can do for them!

  2. ...and back to the regularly scheduled awesomeness. Haha. That wasn't nearly as inappropriate as I thought you'd come up with but sexy and thrilling none the less! :-) Way to go Randy!

  3. Very nice, I was anticipating a "One night at grandma's dinner table I ended up googling myself." LOL I approve of the young Ryan Reynolds, for I would have jumped him also be it bar or rooftop. Bravo, Bravo.

  4. @Hannah: I didn't really know I had a younger guy fantasy, it just kind of happened when the opportunity presented itself. I think maybe in his case it was more of a Ryan Reynolds fantasy. Has since kind of been a reoccurring theme though so maybe I am in denial.

    @Jewels: Yep, thanks to my Sweet Kat, sex is back on the post menu. It was much more inappropriate than detailed here trust me, you would have been proud. Just me, him, a chair, and a rooftop. It was delicious. I just summarized it here for the sake of modesty (snickers at my mention of modesty...)

    @Normal: such low expectations of my inappropriateness, but the googling at gma's table is pretty much inappropriate yes! Yes, the RR look alike deserved to be me!

  5. How tall was he?

    This must only happen to tall guys, because in college some random girl never did this to me.


  6. @Lance: He was a solid 6'2" just for trivia. My condolences on not having a hot older woman school you during your college years sir, not everyone can be lucky enough to run across a girl like me in that pivotal, impressionable time. lol It's a shame really...

  7. I wish I could blame my corruption on the one time I slept with an older woman, but I'm afraid I ended up showing her a few things.

    Good on you though making the world a better place, one inappropriate act at a time.

  8. @Hero: Sorry your older woman fell short on the corruption. We can't all be fantastic I guess, as sad as it is to think about. Good for you for showing her how it's done!

  9. I can't write about stuff like this on my blog because my mom reads it. **sniffle sniffle** I don't want to put her in an early grave. I mean I am her baby. Yes, at 36 she still calls me that.

    Great story, lady! I love the "up against the wall in a dark corner in the back of the bar". Hot!

  10. I dig this post... makes me long for my college years. Not that I was pulling in older hotties for rooftop action or anything like that, I just went to more baseball games back then. ha!


  11. Whooo! Randy schoolin' the college boy! I love it, my darling.~ You more than surpassed my expectations in this prompt. ;-)

  12. Yeah, I am curious to what your answer would be to Lance's question pertaining to the young ones height. I don't remember very much when it comes to the years that I attended college, or, of the five or six years that followed for that matter. But I know that I never had it out with an older woman.

  13. @Heather: That is precisely why no family member has any knowledge of that fact that I have a blog. Then fun would all come to an end and I certainly don't want that. Yes, the dark corner/up against the wall portion of the night was a highlight for sure. So seldom that I go for public shenanigans but all bets were off that night. Yum.

    @SD: Yes, I do love a day at Wrigley Field. And a hot night afterwards is simply icing on the cake. I'm sure you pulled in your fair share of classy older lady friends as a co-ed. Don't be modest SD!

    @sweet Kat: It's all your fault that I am back to sex again... I was trying to be introspective for a minute. That minute has passed! Thanks for the great challenge today, I totally needed my ass kicked to do any post today so thanks for said ass kicking! It was kinda hot, you sexy thing! *mwah*~

    @ib: He was 6'2". And delicious. I couldn't help myself. He was also 21. Yeah, I know, totally shouldn't have. And, for you lack of memory, are you sure you didn't have it out with an older woman and just forgot afterwards???

  14. I need to meet more women like you!

  15. I think I'm sure. Do you know something that I don't? Do tell. Did we? No, I am much to short for your liking.

    For the record, I like the other you too. I would never get bored with either of you. I am in the process of writing something on "concret" also.

  16. @Lost: Good luck with that babe, I am sure I am one in a million right?!? At least that's what I like to tell myself.

    @ib: No recollection of you and I, but stranger things have happened right pumpkin?? lol
    Thanks for enjoying both sides of RG. Can't wait to read your Concrete post! Let me know when it's up ok?

  17. age ain't nuttin but a number ESPECIALLY if he looks like Ryan Reynolds...

  18. @Stacie: Yes ma'am, you do indeed understand my thought process precisely! Welcome to Random Girl and thanks for the follow!


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